A letter to the PM

Dear Mr. Manmohan Singh,

I hope this letter finds you in the pink of health and consciousness (I am doubting the latter though) .And convey my hearty congratulations to Ms Sonia Gandhi on her being declared as one of the most influential persons of the contemporary world order. (I am certain she is influential, she runs the world's largest democracy even without being on power!).

I decided to write to you, to commiserate with you on your bag of troubles that have suddenly shrouded you. I want to congratulate you on having successfully demonstrated your philosophical, spiritual and populist side in the wake of elections. Unfortunately for you , your problems started in 2007 when the prices started rising and eventually the sub prime crisis, and then India's participation in the global markets collapse, and then the unheard of levels of inflation in the country. Riding on a continued growth story for the rest of your term, it has been unfortunate for you that all your troubles should resurface on a possibly election year. Tough luck mate.

No doubt you have tried your best though. Rs 60,000 crores of a gift for inefficient farmers surely will encourage them to concentrate lesser on their farming and more on your vote bank. It' s good in many ways, firstly it saves the trouble of having to produce efficiently. Clearly your methods have ensured lack of quality supply of food grains, through populist measures like these and ones in the past. I know the critics argue that to control the inflation we must improve our supply (contrary to what your schemes have done). But never mind the critics, you can control the inflation by reducing the demand for food grains and other products instead . After all "reducing demand" serves just as good as "improving supply".

You have already started implementing the "reduce demand" campaign, you have advised corporates to reduce their paychecks themselves in a "moral" move to help reduce inflation. You have asked them to earn lesser and lesser until they don't have enough money to spend. This seems like sound logic. After all where can there be a demand if there is not enough liquidity to buy. I'm sure the banks are supporting you to a good extent. They have increased their CRR, and helping in curbing liquidity in the market. I like your thinking so much that I have asked my family to eat lesser and lesser everyday, in a week's time we will need no wheat, rice, soya or oil.

This way the international rise in prices have no bearing on our family. I am advising my neighbours to follow suit.

I am sure you don't consider strengthening the rupee as a solution, as this will affect our exports and hence the growth. It is important that the US continues to buy our series of hi tech software even if we have completely given up eating grains in a "moral" move to save the economy. Yes! growth is more important. It is important that the US continues to buy website maintenance services even if they can't afford to pay for it (in the wake of the impending recession). It is okay, if domestic consumption is restricted through rising interest rates. After all consumption is bad for the inflation; the momentum tends to create demand.

I was wondering what other plans you have up your sleeve? Maybe attack rising fuel prices by promoting bullock carts? Or identify weak ailing farmers and give them more money to produce only weeds for the bullocks to eat? Yeah! and ask the Indian railways to consider making rails out of stone instead of steel? I am amazed at the choices you have.

Thank you for the direction. India is shining after all.

your sincerely

Citizen of India.